Slaughtered Vomit Dolls (2006)

 

Excruciating…

My quest to seek out the sickest, goriest and most disturbing films created has finally led me to Slaughtered Vomit Dolls. Can I call it a film? I say yes, under extreme doubt. At no point was my feeble little mind able to grasp just what the hell I was watching. And I really tried to. So for your and my convenience I’ve added what imdb claims to be the plot. Take a deep breath and read aloud: “The gruesome tapestry of psychological manifestations of a nineteen year old bulimic runaway stripper-turned prostitute as she descends into a hellish pit of satanic nightmares and hallucinations.” That makes a lot more sense than the actual movie. A movie doesn’t have to be perfectly obvious for me to enjoy, quite the contrary. In a world of movies deathly afraid you won’t understand them, a lot become provokingly obvious in what they are trying to convey. Take that Crash (2004)! Subtlety can get you a long way with me. That is however NOT the case with Slaughtered Vomit Dolls. And what subtlety it has in regards to plot it effectively destroys with its graphic carnage of various sorts. Then again it would be naïve of me to think a word like subtle would have anything to do with a movie called Slaughtered Vomit Dolls.

 Another excruciating moment in Slaughtered Vomit Dolls.

After the first five minutes I started hoping a at least somewhat coherent narrative would eventually emerge. As you’ve already realized, my wish was not granted. The films biggest selling point, apart from gore, vomiting and nudity, is its unconventional narrative structure. You never get any sense of development. The frequency of disgusting imagery of people vomiting picks up as the movie moves forward, but that’s about it. We’re all the way bombarded with images. And I mean bombarded. It’s as if director Lucifer Valentine wants to kill you by overloading your senses. The editing here is truly uncompromising. Accept it or die! I was left with a thunderous headache and you’ll likely be too should you choose to watch it. Slaughtered Vomit Dolls feels like the creation of a hyperactive schizophrenic, on a sugar rush with added adrenalin shots just to send him completely over the edge. Give this man a camera and send him off.

Slaughtered Vomit Dolls is an exhausting experience. The copious amounts of gore and vomit weren’t quite as offensive as expected, but my eyes still steered away from the screen at times. Not so much because it was sickening in itself, but the visual style and editing with the on screen action was, well, nauseating.

With a modest running time of 71 minutes this is still one of the biggest endurance tests I have had to suffer through. As the movie ended I had to open a window to get some fresh air into the room. Maybe that’s a compliment to the movie. Either way I would actually rather watch Epic Movie than return to this film. Those are words I won’t say lightly. Slaughtered Vomit Dolls is still a more creative film though. I’ve already spent more words on this review than it deserves. It’s a highly painful experience to watch. See at your own risk.

1/10